Being in your 20’s can be a difficult time. Especially, when you tend to be introverted, a homebody and prefer to keep a small group of friends. I have never been one of those people that has tons of friends and an active social life. I like to be home, I enjoy hanging out with my family and a few good friends.
That being said now that everyone is adults with full time jobs and spread across the country, free time is pretty limited and getting together doesn’t happen nearly as often as it used to. Life can feel pretty lonely at times.
If you’re anything like me, it can take weeks before you realize how lonely you’re feeling, but when it hits, it hits hard. The question then is how does one feel happy and fulfilled when they spend most of their time alone?
Here are a few of my tips and tricks to feel content and happy all by yourself:
- Listen to happy music
- Listening to sad, lonely, depressing music just perpetuates feelings of loneliness, but happy music helps lift up your mood and can even inspire a dance party!
- Read a book
- Books are like entry into another world. Reading allows you to escape reality for a few hours and dive into a whole new universe where you can discover new friends, fall in love, and discover a world you’ve never known.
- I love to write especially fiction. For me it is akin to reading. It allows me to create my own world. It lets me escape my problems or even allows me to play out different scenarios I have going on in my mind.
- Buy a plant
- Now, I must admit I’m a bit of a black thumb. I tend to kill plants, but I try… I think buying a plant is something anyone can do. It’s nice to have something to nurture, care for and take up some time. It’s also easier and cheaper to take of than an animal. Plus, if you buy something like lavender, aloe, or something similar, plants have properties that can help cleanse the air, calm you down, and bring good energy into your space.
- Write a letter to a friend
- Remembering to take time to appreciate a friends is a great idea. It may seem like it would make you feel lonelier, but truly starting up a pen pal relationship with a friend that lives in a different state is exiting and makes you feel more connected and less alone.
- Buy or make something for someone you’re upset with
- When I get lonely I tend to be upset with my boyfriend, friends and/or family. I feel like they don’t have enough time or don’t care enough about me to make time. I know this is irrational, but feelings aren’t often rational. For me, buying or making something for one of these people that I’m made at makes me stop being upset and helps me remember why I love and appreciate them.
- Do the things you want to do anyways
- One of the biggest lessons I’ve learned is to do it anyways. You want to go out to eat? Do it. You want to go to the butterfly garden? Go! You want to go to the movies? Just go do it! Don’t wait for other people to be around to do the things you want to do. Get comfortable doing things you enjoy by yourself.
- Take a bath
- There is nothing I love better than to take a hot bath with bubbles, epsom salt, a bath bomb, and/or essential oils. I pour myself a glass of wine and read a good book or watch a TV show or movie.
- Take a walk
- Listen to music, a podcast, or do some sort of scavenger hunt. When I’m walking I love to take in my surroundings. I live in a historic area, so lots of buildings have plaques and histories on them. But, I also like to look for pretty trees, plants, gardens, houses for sale, anything of interest that get me out of my head and in the now. I even sometimes bring a notebook to jot down observations, make drawing, and collect random flyers and such that are interesting.